Finally.. AY09/10 Sem 1 is over..

"It's 3 o'clock now. Stop writing. Please remain seated while we are collecting your paper and...". I took a very deep breath and sighed right after knowing that it was already 3 o'clock. Well, it was my last exam paper for AY09/10 Sem 1 and my heart was, ironically, filled with guilty, sorrow and joy.

I sighed because days gone by very fast; I felt guilty because I don't think I've put 100% of my effort into my study; I felt sorrow because i don't think I've done well for my exams; I felt joy simply because finally I got one month break after 15 weeks of study.

Some of you may think that it is almost impossible or even crazy to put 100% of our effort into something. If we were to put 100% of our effort into study, it means that we will have no entertainment and our life is simply sleep, eat and study for 15 weeks.

Before the semester start, i was really planning to do so. Unfortunately, I can only hold it for 3 days and my faith started to shake. "Forget it! 80% of effort is already more than enough! Normal human being can only put in 70% of their effort! I'm far more hard working than they do! Let's watch Naruto now!" I told myself so and i smiled. By using the same excuse now and then, eventually, I think I've only put in 50% of my effort into study.

By looking back now, I felt really guilty by telling myself so. If my results turned out to be satisfying, should I thank Buddha (I'm a Buddhist.) or simply 50% of my effort is good enough? What if my results turned out to be disappointing? Do I really have to push myself to 100% for next semester?

One of my friend suggested me to just try my best to study(I really don't know how to define the meaning of "try my best" here. How much is "my best"?); take a reasonably break when you are tired or bored and don't "look back" (by writing this entry, I'm "looking back" and it is against the suggestion) and be content with whatever grades you got.

Well, maybe I can only put in 50% of my effort and it is already "my best" (it seems a little bit too low...right?).